Lets examine this closer:
The ESV reads:
9 Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, 10 nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
The Holy Bible: English Standard Version. Crossway Bibles, 2016, p. 1 Co 6:9–11.
The ESV has a footnote regarding vs "homosexual", which reads:
The two Greek terms translated by this phrase refer to the passive and active partners in consensual homosexual acts.
The Greek text for vs 9 reads as follows (UBS5)
ἢ οὐκ οἴδατε ὅτι ἄδικοι θεοῦ βασιλείαν οὐ κληρονομήσουσιν; μὴ πλανᾶσθε· οὔτε πόρνοι οὔτε εἰδωλολάτραι οὔτε μοιχοὶ οὔτε
μαλακοὶ οὔτε
ἀρσενοκοῖται
Aland, Barbara, et al., editors.
The Greek New Testament. Fifth Revised Edition, Deutsche Bibelgesellschaft, 2014, p. 1 Co 6:9.
The two words of note in the passage are μαλακός and ἀρσενοκοίτης or Malakos and Arnsenokiotes
-BDAG defines μαλακός (malakos) as:
μαλακός, ή, όν (s. two prec. entries; ‘soft’: Hom. et al.; ins, pap, LXX, Philo; Jos., Ant. 8, 72 βύσσος μ.; Mel., P. 80, 594 στρωμνῆς μ.)
① pert. to being yielding to touch, soft, of things: clothes (Hom. et al.; Artem. 1, 78 p. 73, 10 ἱματίων πολυτελῶν κ. μαλακῶν; PSI 364, 5 ἱμάτιον μαλ.) μ. ἱμάτια soft garments, such as fastidious people wear Lk 7:25. (τὰ) μ. soft clothes (Sb 6779, 57; s. λευκός 2, end) Mt 11:8ab.
② pert. to being passive in a same-sex relationship, effeminate esp. of catamites, of men and boys who are sodomized by other males in such a relationship, opp. ἀρσενοκοίτης (Dionys. Hal. 7, 2, 4; Dio Chrys. 49 [66], 25; Ptolem., Apotel. 3, 15, 10; Vett. Val. 113, 22; Diog. L. 7, 173; PHib 54, 11 [c. 245 b.c.] may have this mng.: a musician called Zenobius ὁ μαλακός [prob. with a sideline, according to Dssm., LO 131, 4—LAE 164, 4]. S. also a Macedon. ins in LDuchesne and CBayet, Mémoire sur une Mission au Mont Athos 1876 no. 66 p. 46; Plautus, Miles 668 cinaedus [Gk. κίναιδος] malacus; cp. the attack on the morality of submissive homoeroticism Aeschin. 1, 188; DCohen, Greece and Rome 23, ’76, 181f) 1 Cor 6:9 (‘male prostitutes’ NRSV is too narrow a rendering; ‘sexual pervert’ REB is too broad)=Pol 5:3.—S. lit. s.v. ἀρσενοκοίτης. B. 1065. DELG. M-M.
Arndt, William, et al.
A Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament and Other Early Christian Literature, 3rd ed., University of Chicago Press, 2000, p. 613.
-ἀρσενοκοίτης or (Arsenokoites) is defined as "male bedder".
ἀρσενοκοίτης, ου, ὁ (ἄρσην ‘male’ + κοίτη ‘bed’; Bardesanes 719 Fgm. 3b 10, 25 p. 653 Jac. [in Eus., PE 6, 10, 25]; Anth. Pal. 9, 686, 5 and Cat. Cod. Astr. VIII/4 p. 196, 6 and 8 have the sp. ἀρρενοκοίτης; Theoph. Ant. 1, 2 [p. 60, 27]; in a vice list—ἀρσενοκοιτεῖν SibOr 2, 73; AcJ 36 [Aa II/1, 169]; cp. the association of ἄρσην and κοίτη Lev 20:13, s. Soph. Lex.: ἀ.= ὁ μετὰ ἄρσενος κοιμώμενος κοίτην γυναικείαν=‘one who has intercourse w. a man as w. a woman’; cp. the formation of μητροκοίτης [μήτηρ + κοίτη] ‘one who has intercourse w. his mother’ Hipponax 15, 2 Diehl3 [=Degani 20, 2]) a male who engages in sexual activity w. a pers. of his own sex, Pederast, 1 Cor 6:9 (on the impropriety of RSV’s ‘homosexuals’ [altered to ‘sodomites’ NRSV] s. WPetersen, VigChr 40, ’86, 187–91; cp. DWright, ibid. 41, ’87, 396–98; REB’s rendering of μαλακοὶ οὔτε ἀρσενοκοῖται w. the single term ‘sexual pervert’ is lexically unacceptable), of one who assumes the dominant role in same-sex activity, opp. μαλακός (difft. DMartin, in Biblical Ethics and Homosexuality, ed. RBrawley, ’96, 117–36); 1 Ti 1:10; Pol 5:3. Cp. Ro 1:27. Romans forbade pederasty w. free boys in the Lex Scantinia, pre-Cicero (JBremmer, Arethusa 13, ’80, 288 and notes); Paul’s strictures against same-sex activity cannot be satisfactorily explained on the basis of alleged temple prostitution (on its rarity, but w. some evidence concerning women used for sacred prostitution at Corinth s. LWoodbury, TAPA 108, ’78, 290f, esp. note 18 [lit.]), or limited to contract w. boys for homoerotic service (s. Wright, VigChr 38, ’84, 125–53). For condemnation of the practice in the Euphrates region s. the ref. to Bardesanes above.—RBurton, The Book of the Thousand Nights and a Night, 1934, vol. 6, 3748–82, lit. reff. and anthropological data relating to a variety of Mediterranean cultures; DBailey, Homosexuality and the Western Christian Tradition, ’55; KDover, Greek Homosexuality ’78; RScroggs, The NT and Homosexuality ’83; JBoswell, Christianity, Social Tolerance, and Homosexuality ’80; JBremmer, Greek Pederasty, in JBremmer, ed. From Sappho to de Sade2 ’91, 1–14; ECantarella, Bisexuality in the Ancient World ’92.—Pauly-W. 8, 1333f; 1459–68. DELG s.v. ἄρσην. M-M.
Arndt, William, et al.
A Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament and Other Early Christian Literature, 3rd ed., University of Chicago Press, 2000, p. 135.
To put it bluntly, ἀρσενοκοίτης is the man who's pitching, μαλακός is the man catching. The ESV combines the two words to describe homosexual acts. Other translations like the the NASB separate the words out so that it reads "Effeminate and homosexuals).
The NRSV update reads:
9 Do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived! The sexually immoral, idolaters, adulterers, male prostitutes, men who engage in illicit sex,,* 10 thieves, the greedy, drunkards, revilers, swindlers—none of these will inherit the kingdom of God.
with the footnote:
meaning of Gk uncertain
New Revised Standard Version: Updated Edition. Friendship Press, 2021, p. 1 Co 6:9–10.
So let me get this straight, in the year 2000 we knew what μαλακός and ἀρσενοκοίτης meant and had solid lexical support but suddenly in 2021 we didn't. Was there an avalanche of scholarship or new texts that were discovered? Nope, the editors of the NRSV UE are
lying to us. Even BDAG recognizes that Paul is referencing Lev 20:13 in the LXX:
13 Καὶ ὃς ἂν κοιμηθῇ μετὰ
ἄρσενος κοίτην γυναικὸς, βδέλυγμα ἐποίησαν ἀμφότεροι· θανάτῳ θανατούσθωσαν, ἔνοχοι εἰσιν.
13 And whoever lies with a
male in sexual intercourse as with a woman, they have both committed an abomination; ⌊let them be executed⌋; they are guilty.
Brenton, Lancelot C. L.
The Septuagint Version: Greek. Samuel Bagster & Sons, 1851, p. Le 20:13.
Brannan, Rick, et al., editors.
The Lexham English Septuagint. Lexham Press, 2012, p. Le 20:13.
Quibble over the choice of homosexual all you want but the behavior is clearly forbidden regardless of orientation or any other reason. If someone feels attracted to members of the opposite sex then they should repent and mortify that sin. Understand that Jesus Christ bled and died for that sin too and in Him is forgiveness and life eternal. As for the deacon, he should take a sabbatical for a season until this issue is resolved. If the issue cannot be resolved then he should resign. The church and Christians everywhere should pray for and assist with the situation. At no point should the father disassociate with his son, but neither can the father accept his son's choice.