I can’t let you know where I think you are wrong because I honestly don’t know what you were saying.
I don't know what your "dark nights" seem to you to be, I can only relate my own life experience.
When I was first born again in 1981, immediately following my water baptism, which was my first act done to demonstrate my newfound faith, I became completely "quiet" inside. No passions, not good passions, not evil passions, nothing. No lust no joy no nothing. I still remember it. I had no concept of what was happening, only that every seemed to expect something different from where I was at. I had a completely flat emotional affect, with no sense of need or desire or anything. And I had no sense of God, with me, speaking to me, nothing. This lasted for about a week, and when my feelings and such returned, they were different. And I discovered that as I began to read the Bible, it was different.
After about 5-6 years, I had returned to much of my sin, and over the next 10 years or so, I lived an up/down sort of life. But the stranglehold of my sin grew worse and worse and I was miserable.
God had prepared some things that came into play, and re-awakened my faith, enough at least for me to hold up my sinfulness to Him, begging Him to take it away.
Then came that emptiness, the emptying out of all emotion, no sense of need or desire, no sense of anything really, and no sense of God with me, I only knew that I needed to just keep trusting Him, and to just wait. I don't remember exactly, 2-3 weeks or so, the darkness started to lift, I started feeling more normal. Not long later, I was praying to God for more of His power in my life. He directed me towards my then pastor laying his hands on me in prayer. After that prayer, joy came flooding in more than I'd ever known. I could sense the power that was just pouring into me. I KNEW my life would never be the same after that. And it wasn't.
I began to receive gifts to minister with, and began to serve. That was about 20 years ago.
And as the years went by, I still continued to struggle with the same things that have plagued my life. Entangled in the same sins that entangled me in the past.
The third time was different.
It was a deep pit of misery and darkness in the hopelessness of flesh. Hope in God was a tiny point of light in the distance that I don't know if it was even real. I wanted to be dead, and I didn't know if it was ever going to end. After 5 weeks it started to lift,
But God was there with me, in His Word.
Two very notable things had happened before this began. One was that God had moved in me to read Ecclesiastes, which I did over and over, day after day, for maybe a month. I'd read it 4-5 times a day, maybe more. I made a CD and played it in my car as I drove. I played it on my computer at work, and doing chores. I'd take the book in 8 or 10 times a day, more, reading/listening to the book hundreds of times.
During that time of darkness, I ended up confronting the deepest issues in me, and in each case, the words of Ecclesiates answered each one. It's hard to describe the changes in me from this. But I see the Spirit of God, and the fleshy me, plainly within me. The inner and outer man have ceased to be a mystery to me.
The other thing that had happened was this. One night, feeling broken, ruined, "damaged goods", God directed me to Psalm 129, and as I read this short Psalm, the words gripped me,
Psalms 129:1-3 KJV
1) A Song of degrees. Many a time have they afflicted me from my youth, may Israel now say:
2) Many a time have they afflicted me from my youth: yet they have not prevailed against me.
3) The plowers plowed upon my back: they made long their furrows.
This was me. Damaged in childhood as the wicked carved me up.
Psalms 129:4 KJV
4) The LORD is righteous: he hath cut asunder the cords of the wicked.
As I read the word "cut", I could sense inside something cut, falling away from me, gone. I sat there, wondering what had just happened, hoping it was what I thought it could be, afraid to believe it. I knew if this was real, I'd know soon enough.
After about 3 days, I was convinced. God had cut away the effects of flesh from me. Or, I'm still trying to find the words to properly describe this, but it was living with a completely silenced flesh. My trust in God was full, complete, life was peaceful, joyful, wonderful! The Word was alive, my spirit walked in life only. And I enjoyed an unending communion with Jesus. I had no sense of ever being disobedient, only that I did what I wanted, and what I wanted was what God wanted.
This lasted about 5 weeks, "Lord plant my feet on higher ground!" That's what He did.
I remember, though, talking to my friend one day, who experienced his life a lot like I had, and I realized, I couldn't help him! I could tell Him God has released me from the evil inside, and I hope He does for you to! But I couldn't give any real answers!
I asked God to enable me to share this life with others. Not too many days later, that season ended. I remember the exact moment.
So when the next great darkness started, it was with that recent memory of the days of walking in the light.
The message from Ecclesiastes is that no matter what, we are not going to escape from the "plight of humanity", all are subject to reality, and this is reality. We are heavenly creatures living in a depraved and evil world of sin and shame and corruption, with bodies fit for that world.
I've seen the light and the darkness, and I've learned the darkness is great darkness, but the light is greater light.
I'm sorry for how long this is getting!
I've learned that by faith we can walk in that light, free from all ravages of corrupt flesh.
I've learned that I can live in a couple of different ways. One of them is to struggle in my character against sin. To make great mental and emotional efforts to resist temptation and sin. The other is to just know that Jesus accepts me as His own, no matter what else, and in that knowledge, the flesh is quiet. Law provokes sin. ". . . the motions of sin in our members, which is by the Law . . ."
It seems counterintuitive . . . When I stop thinking that sin takes me away from God, I stop sinning. While I trust that I'm am always accepted by God, because my acceptance is in Jesus Christ, not me, while I'm trusting in that, I have full access into the Spirit walk of victory, and life is like those 5 weeks, completely free, joyful, peaceful, faithful, loving, self-controlled. When I start to think I'm disqualifying myself, that my sin will condemn me, I do what everyone does in that situation, I try to hide.
That's what everyone does. When you see you sin, you hide from God. But in Christ, we no longer have to hide, we can come boldly to obtain help . . . when we need it, not when we don't! God doesn't push us away when we need Him most, when we've become entangled in our sin! No. Even when we are walking in the works of the flesh, we are reconciled to God in Christ, and He can release us from that snare in a moment!
I've learned that we choose whether we will trust Him or not, and in choosing to trust Him, we have power to overcome everything.
Much love!