Understanding MPD/DID & SRA/MK

[truthquest]

Something else I want to say about therapists and people in the mental health community, and I'm speaking from first hand experience, is that the Satanic cult has their people carefully placed in every level of society including the mental health community. That doesn't mean that every single therapist is part of a Satanic cult. But there are people in the mental health community who are part of a Satanic cult and they are put into that position to deal with people who have been victims of a Satanic cult. They will try to discredit the victims of a Satanic cult and will deliberately misdiagnose them and prescribe drugs that will make a person feel like a zombie, will cause a person to be paranoid, will cause a person to not be able to think clearly and just be out of it, will cause a person to have suicidal tendencies from those drugs. Then with the suicidal tendencies from the drugs, the person will be told that they are a danger to themselves and will be forced into psych wards over and over when the person didn't have suicidal tendencies before taking those drugs. It's done deliberately by some people in the mental health community. And it ensures that the person will not be believed or taken seriously and will be silenced. And then the person will be reported to the Satanic cult.

Sometimes when a survivor begins to have flashbacks and nightmares. their family will not understand or listen to a word they say or believe what they're saying and will force them into a psych ward. That happened to me. My family, who I thought loved me and would be on my side, and would stand by me, had me put into a psych ward. Just for reacting to flashbacks and nightmares. Then the police showed up and put me in handcuffs like I was a criminal and put me into the backseat of police car and took me to a psych ward. I was not a danger to myself or anybody else.
It was so heartbreaking to me. I felt betrayed by my family. I felt so alone and helpless. Because once you're in that psych ward, those people in charge there have all the power and control over you and will keep you drugged up. They can do whatever they want to do to you and there's nothing you can do about it. And the doors are locked and you can't escape.

Then while you are drugged up, they will take you into a room and interrogate you. They will do that in a such a way as to get information about what you remember and who you've been talking to about it. You have to be careful what you say and not slip up and give too much information or say the wrong thing but being drugged up, it's hard to control what you say.

 

[lilygrace]

i do have it in my records that i reported SA but i said it was a cousin.... i dont even remember when this happened and stuff.

 

[TLHKAJ]

This ought to be discussed. Beware of unbelief because it comes in different guises.

The belief that nothing good can come of something is unbelief, so when the Lord produces water from a stone the blind cannot witness the provision of Almighty God.
The belief that something in particular always produces good is unbelief so when the Lord speaks and says, Turn to the left or turn to the right, the hard of hearing continue in error.

There is only one place to find ourselves: waiting upon the Lord and listening to His voice. If the Lord says, Do this, then we do it; if the Lord says turn from your way, then we turn from our way. The Lord has sent me to a hospital on more than one occasion. Did I balk, believing that the Almighty would never do such a thing? The Lord has spoken, saying I am sending you to this doctor... did I question Him?

No, but then I don't have a background in churchianity so this has never been an issue for me. :)

Yes, it must be at His direction.

After I left a cult church in 2007, God led me to another church. I knew there was cult infiltration. The pastor was illuminati bloodline and many members were cult bloodline. Yet I was sent there. He wanted me to open my mouth and tell them my testimony and He would use it to open their eyes. But He also knew that I would encounter rejection, persecution, and serious threats. All those things happened and it was extremely painful. But still to this day, I know He led me to that church. The pastor was very receptive and I believe God used my testimony to challenge his amnesic barriers.

I love the story about Jesus instructing His disciples to get into a boat and "go to the other side." They obeyed, and then the storm came that was so fierce they thought they would die.

Did Jesus not know there would be a storm when He told them to get into the boat and go to tje other side? Of course not! He knew the storm was coming. But He knew they would make it to the other side, too.

Remember what happened. Jesus came walking on the stormy waves and they all were afraid. They didn't recognize the Lord in the midst of the storm. But when He said, "It is I. Be not afraid." Peter replied... "Lord, if it be You, bid me to walk to You on the water." Jesus said, "Come." And Jesus got out of the boat and walked to the Lord.

We all know what happened. Peter began to get his eyes on the waves and began to sink. He immediately cried out, "Lord, save me!" Jesus reached down and pulled Peter back to his feet, and they walked together back to the boat. And then Jesus calmed the storm.

No matter what the storm looks like, He will get us to the other side as long as we are keeping our eyes on Him.

Peter went on to encounter the lame man who sat begging at the gate, "Silver and gold have I none. But such as I have, I give unto you. In the name of Jesus, rise up and walk!'" Peter gained something in that "storm" experience with the Lord. He learned how to walk by faith and not by sight....eyes on Jesus. That is the "such as I have" that he gave to the lame man. Amazing stuff!

But all that to say ....we just need to know His voice and obey. His instructions won't always make sense. We may encounter challenges and storms along the way. But we can be confident that He will get us to the other side.

 

[TLHKAJ]

I informed you both at the same time.

Ahhh, yes. I remember about a therapist, but I don't remember the other doctors. I believe you though. I'll go back and look.

Please try to remember that faulty memory doesn't mean disbelief. It's just a part of being human.

 

[Jostler]

Your memory isn't serving you well, brother, or perhaps you don't believe my report. I mentioned my experience with three different doctors very recently.

Let me try to clarify what I mean. I mean something very specific when I say "main stream mental health SYSTEM.... That does not mean all psychiatrists or psychologists are all cult controlled. And it does not mean that God will never lead a survivor to a psychologist for help. He has, and He does. I'm familiar with some of those examples too. In one case, a psychiatrist was significantly used to provide very important relief from deprogramming confusion, and sadly that kind of help was completely unavailable to this person when she sought it from "spiritual " (church) sources. I'm talking about a system, not individuals....and none of the caution limits what God might do to guide any person to for healing. But we better be "led". The landscape of the "system that survivors are thrust into, against their will, by outsiders....is fraught with traps...

 

[truthquest]

i do have it in my records that i reported SA but i said it was a cousin.... i dont even remember when this happened and stuff.

In your records. That makes me think of how I would be questioned by the nurse practitioner at the psych ward. I would try not to mention anything SRA related to her. I would focus on my family history of abuse including *****abuse and the abuse in foster care also including *****abuse. She would write down everything I said and later put it all into a computer. That became permanent record including the diagnosis that I was given, that would be permanent record too. She made it clear that it would always be permanent record and that I would never be able to change that. If I had known that ahead of time, I wouldn't have said so much. I guess I was naive to think that what I said was confidential and would go no further beyond me and her. But that's what I was led to believe beforehand.

 

[Jostler]

I have never and will never counsel a survivor to seek out psychiatric help, unless or until the Lord tells me to so clearly I can't possibly be misunderstanding or misinterpreting Him. I doubt He will ever do that, though I'm open to obeying Him if He did....but normally I'd expect Him to clearly reveal His will to the person....as He did for you, Shattered. You were secure, and blessed, by HIS direction...and your obedience to it. As it should be...

 

[lilygrace]

i do have it in my records that i reported SA but i said it was a cousin.... i dont even remember when this happened and stuff.

In your records. That makes me think of how I would be questioned by the nurse practitioner at the psych ward. I would try not to mention anything SRA related to her. I would focus on my family history of abuse including *****abuse and the abuse in foster care also including *****abuse. She would write down everything I said and later put it all into a computer. That became permanent record including the diagnosis that I was given, that would be permanent record too. She made it clear that it would always be permanent record and that I would never be able to change that. If I had known that ahead of time, I wouldn't have said so much. I guess I was naive to think that what I said was confidential and would go no further beyond me and her. But that's what I was led to believe beforehand.

my cousin did have an abusive incident with me but it wasnt prolonged from what i remember. what i told them was pretty harmless then rather than if i accidntally had spoken up now. i was much younger then.... still an adult but i was convinced to let my mother have my health info. legally it was supposed to be confidential for you @truthquest . you did nothing really wrong.
at our family doctor she had it signed that she would make my health decisions in emergencies. they had me update it and i removed her. not sure if it worked.
i feel bad talking bad about my family this because i feel im going back into denial and "wow what happened again?" my memories turn unclear.

my cousin did have an abusive incident with me but it wasnt prolonged from what i remember.

 

[lilygrace]

There is actually a "go crazy" program where, once a survivor's amnesic barriers begin breaking down and they are starting to realize the truth ....they begin to be so flooded with memories that they are totally overloaded and overwhelmed so that they feel compelled to admit themselves into a hospital. I almost did that back in about 2008. I was so exhausted from flood after flood of memories that I just wanted to sleep .....for a very long time. But it was a program. I would have been immediately reprogrammed once I got into the hospital (which is the whole point, to shore things back up).

interesting. this year as im flooded and feeling more present..... and its not much more new memories....but being present and more aware. i felt like going to the hospital like i needed it. but right before that a lady i know who is a church addictions leader suggested that i get on meds or maybe go to the hospital just cos i said i wouldnt mind if God let me die in my sleep. as if there is something wrong with that. wanting to die but choosing to still live is actually sane and healthy.
but ever since then i struggle more with self harm again. if people just see me as mental and dont want to get to know me, then....
i never did go to the hospital since maybe 2015.
mom wanted to call an ambulance last week and i grabbed her legs....

 

[truthquest]

my cousin did have an abusive incident with me but it wasnt prolonged from what i remember. what i told them was pretty harmless then rather than if i accidntally had spoken up now. i was much younger then.... still an adult but i was convinced to let my mother have my health info. legally it was supposed to be confidential for you @truthquest . you did nothing really wrong.
at our family doctor she had it signed that she would make my health decisions in emergencies. they had me update it and i removed her. not sure if it worked.
i feel bad talking bad about my family this because i feel im going back into denial and "wow what happened again?" my memories turn unclear.

my cousin did have an abusive incident with me but it wasnt prolonged from what i remember.

I hope your mother doesn't have power of attorney over your medical decisions.

I decided after that last time in a psych ward, which was about seven years ago more or less, maybe eight, to stop taking those drugs. My family objected to that but I told them that those drugs were having really bad effects on me including suicidal tendencies. When those drugs were finally out of my system, I felt so much better. I could think clearly, make good decisions, took better care of myself, was no longer paranoid and was no longer suicidal. I also decided that I will never be forced back into a psych ward no matter what. I told my family don't you dare ever do that to me again if you care even a little bit about me. And they never did that again.

Of course, I still had flashbacks and nightmares to deal with because that didn't stop. But I also had a new trigger to deal with. When I would hear a police car siren or see a police car, I would become upset and start shaking and my heart would start beating really fast. I felt like they were coming to put me in handcuffs again and take me to a psych ward.

My family is much more supportive now. They can see how far I've come, how strong I am, how much better I'm doing with handling flashbacks and nightmares, and they understand better about the flashbacks and nightmares and they know why I have them and they believe me now.

 

[Jostler]

Lilygrace, I know you are not crazy...not by a long shot. Your mental ability is defined by reaching logical conclusions and extrapolation based on what you know. It is easy enough to observe your thought processes, just by how you communicate even at this distance.. and easy enough to be absolutely convinced you are very stably, fully sane.

Our conclusions may change, or even be reversed once we know more than we did before, or if we discover that something we once belived was true, is proven to be a lie. But that change does not mean we were crazy before...or after. Thank God He teaches us, and the Truth sets us free.

 

[Jostler]

And when He does....we change our minds and draw different inferences and conclusions :) if we're smart....and you are smart :)

 

[truthquest]

interesting. this year as im flooded and feeling more present..... and its not much more new memories....but being present and more aware. i felt like going to the hospital like i needed it. but right before that a lady i know who is a church addictions leader suggested that i get on meds or maybe go to the hospital just cos i said i wouldnt mind if God let me die in my sleep. as if there is something wrong with that. wanting to die but choosing to still live is actually sane and healthy.
but ever since then i struggle more with self harm again. if people just see me as mental and dont want to get to know me, then....
i never did go to the hospital since maybe 2015.
mom wanted to call an ambulance last week and i grabbed her legs....

I have felt so overwhelmed that I prayed to die so many times. I felt like I was up against something that I couldn't possibly defeat. But we can because God is with us and will give us the strength to overcome anything. It reminds me of the story of David and Goliath. David defeated Goliath because God was with him. When I think about that, I raise my head up high and I say, I will not be defeated and I will not give in. No retreat and no surrender.

 

[lilygrace]

Lilygrace, I know you are not crazy...not by a long shot. Your mental ability is defined by reaching logical conclusions and extrapolation based on what you know. It is easy enough to observe your thought processes, just by how you communicate even at this distance.. and easy enough to be absolutely convinced you are very stably, fully sane.

Our conclusions may change, or even be reversed once we know more than we did before, or if we discover that something we once belived was true, is proven to be a lie. But that change does not mean we were crazy before...or after. Thank God He teaches us, and the Truth sets us free.

Could i be lying? That's what really torments me. If "he" was what i said "he" was someone else could have said so after i did.

 

[Shattered]

Let me try to clarify what I mean. I mean something very specific when I say "main stream mental health SYSTEM.... That does not mean all psychiatrists or psychologists are all cult controlled. And it does not mean that God will never lead a survivor to a psychologist for help. He has, and He does. I'm familiar with some of those examples too. In one case, a psychiatrist was significantly used to provide very import relief from deprogramming confusion, and sadly that kind of help was completely unavailable to this person when she sought it from "spiritual " (church) sources. I'm talking about a system, not individuals....and none of the caution l I limits what God might guide any person to for healing. But we better be "led". The landscape of the "system that survivors are thrust into, against their will, by outsiders....is fraught with traps...

This is precisely what needs to take place. It's the difference between you and me, brother. I've witnessed the Lord move upon "outsiders" and so I view no one as an outsider, having been one myself. I still am in some ways and this topic reminds me of that truth now and then. So does this forum, and so do the pulpits and pews. You remind me of this, too.

So do the Christians I meet, like the small group who gathered in one of our offices earlier this evening. I looked after their needs and cleaned up when they departed.

Why should we be afraid or suspicious of anything? So it's a trap... so was the lion's den. So was the Sanhedrin, so was Pilate, and the same could be said about the day we were born into this world. The truth is hard because the Lord Himself will lead us into our every fear and we shall see each one come to pass. This was the word of the Lord spoken by His servants whom He sent many years ago:

My every fear would come true. I would be cast out; I would be rejected, and I would wander without a place to rest my head like the Son of Man before me, for the servant is not greater than his Master. I would die with Him and be buried with Him, and on that day when the Lord called me forth nothing would be the same again.

This was the prophecy and every word was proven true. It came to pass over 25 years worth of suffering, deprivation, homelessness, poverty, and hardship. I was defeated and dead but the Lord raised me up and declared, As I have overcome this world, so do you. I walked in the fire and He gave me a mantle of white to wear.

So what do I really fear? Hurting you. The truth is hard and what we endure is even harder and so the Lord brings you before me and declares,

Face fear as you have many times before, My son. Is it such a hard thing? Just as you walked in the fire and were not harmed, so you must walk in the fire again. It is your place to overcome.

Of course it's a trap. :)

 

[Jostler]

Could i be lying? That's what really torments me. If "he" was what i said "he" was someone else could have said so after i did.

I'm not clear what you mean? The one person on earth we can never really lie to, is ourselves. I'd think if you were lying, you would know it? Maybe I'm misunderstanding the point uou are trying to make?

 

[Jostler]

This is precisely what needs to take place. It's the difference between you and me, brother. I've witnessed the Lord move upon "outsiders" and so I view no one as an outsider, having been one myself. I still am in some ways and this topic reminds me of that truth now and then. So does this forum, and so do the pulpits and pews. You remind me of this, too.

So do the Christians I meet, like the small group who gathered in one of our offices earlier this evening. I looked after their needs and cleaned up when they departed.

Why should we be afraid or suspicious of anything? So it's a trap... so was the lion's den. So was the Sanhedrin, so was Pilate, and the same could be said about the day we were born into this world. The truth is hard because the Lord Himself will lead us into our every fear and we shall see each one come to pass. This was the word of the Lord spoken by His servants whom He sent many years ago:

My every fear would come true. I would be cast out; I would be rejected, and I would wander without a place to rest my head like the Son of Man before me, for the servant is not greater than his Master. I would die with Him and be buried with Him, and on that day when the Lord called me forth nothing would be the same again.

This was the prophecy and every word was proven true. It came to pass over 25 years worth of suffering, deprivation, homelessness, poverty, and hardship. I was defeated and dead but the Lord raised me up and declared, As I have overcome this world, so do you. I walked in the fire and He gave me a mantle of white to wear.

So what do I really fear? Hurting you. The truth is hard and what we endure is even harder and so the Lord brings you before me and declares,

Face fear as you have many times before, My son. Is it such a hard thing? Just as you walked in the fire and were not harmed, so you must walk in the fire again. It is your place to overcome.

Of course it's a trap. :)

I'm not certain certain exactly what you are trying to show me here? I can face my own "traps" according to the level of belief I'm walking in at the time....some days I do better than others. :) But He is growing me in time..

 

[Jostler]

Actually I'm truly lost. What is it that needs to take place? What difference between us are you referring to? Can you clarify those for me? I'm not sure how " outsiders got involved? Confused....

 

[truthquest]

i have trouble calling God my father stil.
it makes my stomach feel hurt.

I think I understand why you feel that way.

My biological father was mean, abusive, evil, and cruel. There's no doubt about that. He was especially cruel to my older brother. He enjoyed torturing him.... I saw him r.*** my oldest sister more than once, many times in fact. She was about eight or nine at the time but it probably started before that. My mother had the nerve to blame my sister for that and defended our father... He didn't abuse me that way but I was terrified of him. And of course, he sold his children to a Satanic cult. I don't even know know what he got in return. My mother left him when I was about three years old. She met my stepfather and took up with him. He was an abusive alcoholic, womanizer, child molester(of his own daughter and my oldest sister), woman beater, child beater and mean, very mean. He had been married before and had several children. One of his children, a son, lived with us. That son, when he was a teenager, ....r.**** me when I was six years old. That was the first time anything like that had happened to me. But it happened a lot after that.

My mother worshipped the ground my stepfather walked on and I'm not even exaggerating. I also heard her say once that she would follow us(her children) to our graves before she would leave him.

Then came foster care. I was devastated when I was pulled out of my mother's arms that night and I was screaming and crying. I was eight years old. After that, not having a mother or father around anymore, I turned to my heavenly Father for love, comfort, help, for someone to listen to me when I felt hurt or sad. I would go off somewhere alone to escape abuse usually in the woods and I would marvel at the beauty of nature there, the trees, flowers, animals. I would sit against a tree and take it all in and think about my heavenly Father who created it. I could feel God's love when I would be thinking like that about him. One time, the sun's rays came down through the trees and all around me and I reached out into it with my hand and smiled and thought, how beautiful this is and how wonderful You are. I would go to the woods more and more often. I found such peace there and I felt closer to God, my heavenly Father there. I felt safe and protected there. ...That's the best I can do to explain how I was feeling as a young child at that time. I felt closer to my heavenly Father in those woods than I felt in any church I've ever been to.

 

[Jostler]

I have a really off topic seeming (its not) question.

How many of you have heard there will be a Pentagon report to Congress on military encounters with UAP's on the 25th of this month?