horsecamp said:
OK LUTHERANS can debate stuff like------ how many Lutherans does it take to change a light bulb ...
we can also debate things like what color to paint our church .
.. we dont beleive we have a right to debate.. what God has said in his word ..
why would a christian even think he or she has a right to debate that
defend it yes -apologetics ---------- but debate with some one about it.. as if Gods word is open for debat ------debatable ?
do REFORMED protestant TRADITIONS non denom denoms really think that Jesus dying for them should be debatable ?
OR ANY OTHER TRUTH in the bible. God tells us .
.
Uh... I don't get it. :wacko: Is there suppose to be a punchline here? :blink:
I was looking for something like this... (Courtesy of
http://wilk4.com/humor/humorc8.htm)
How many
Charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one since his/her hands are in the air anyway.
-Or-
Five. One to change the bulb and four to bind the spirit of darkness in the room.
How many
Calvinists does it take to change a light bulb?
None. God has predestined when the lights will be on.
-Or-
Calvinists do not change light bulbs. They simply read out the instructions and pray the light bulb will decide to change itself.
How many
neo-evangelicals does it take to change a light bulb?
No one knows. They can't tell the difference between light and darkness.
How many
Pentecostals does it take to change a light bulb?
Ten. One to change the bulb and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.
How many
TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
How many
fundamentalists or independent Baptists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one because any more would be compromise and ecumenical standards of light would slip.
How many
liberals does it take to change a light bulb?
At least ten, as they need to hold a debate on whether or not the light
bulb exists. Even if they can agree upon the existence of the light
bulb, they still may not change it to keep from alienating those who
might use other forms of light.
How many
Anglicans or Catholics does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They always use candles.
How many
campfire worship leaders does it take to change light bulb?
One. But soon all those around can warm up to its glowing.
How many
Episcopalians does it take to change a light bulb?
Ten. One to call the electrician, and nine to say how much they liked the old one better.
-Or-
Four. One to change the bulb. One to bless the elements. One to pour
the sherry. And one to offer a toast to the old light bulb.
How many
Baptists does it take to change a light bulb?
CHANGE???????
-Or-
At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to
approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad.
How many
Southern Baptists does it take to change a light bulb?
About 16,000,000. However, they are badly divided over whether changing the bulb is a fundamental need or not.
How many
Nazarenes does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to change the bulb. Another to replace the new with the old
after shaking it and finding it can be revived with a second blessing.
-Or-
Six. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.
How many
United Church of Christ members does it take to change a light bulb?
Eleven. One to change the light bulb. And ten more to organize a
covered dish supper that will follow the changing of the bulb service.
How many
Lutherans does it take to change a light bulb?
There is some question here. But we have it on good authority that they
have appointed a committee to study the issue and report back at their
next meeting.
-Or-
We read that we are to so fear and
love God that we cannot by our own effort or understanding comprehend
the replacement of an electromagnetic photon source. It is, rather by
faith, NOT by our efforts (effected toward the failed worldly
incandescence), that we truly see, and that our own works cannot fully
justify us in the presence of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Of
course, it is still dark.
-Or-
None. Lutherans don't believe in change.
How many
Amish does it take to change a light bulb?
What's a light bulb?
How many
Mormons does it take to change a light bulb?
Five. One man to change bulb & four wives to tell him how to do it.
How many
Presbyterians does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.
How many
Unitarians does it take to change a light bulb?
300. 12 to sit on the Board which appoints the Nominating and Personnel
Committee. 5 to sit on the Nominating and Personnel Committee, which
appoints the House Committee. 8 to sit on the House Committee, which
appoints the Light Bulb changing committee. 4 to sit on the Light Bulb
Changing Committee, which chooses who will screw in the Light
Bulb--those 4 then give their own opinion of "screwing in methods" while
the one actually does the installation. After completion it takes 100
individuals to complain about the method of installation and another 177
to debate the ecological impact of using the light bulb at all.
How many
United Methodists does it take to change a light bulb?
We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the
need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey, you have found
that a light bulb works for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a
poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship to your
light bulb and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday
service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions,
including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-lived, and tinted;
all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence through Jesus
Christ.
-Or-
Undetermined. Whether your light is
bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved --you can be a light
bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church wide lighting service is
planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.