Jesus had parables, St. SteVen has parodies. - Coincidence? - LOL

[St. SteVen]

--- PARODY ---

Person #1: Receive the free gift of eternal life.
Person #2: No thanks.
Person #1: I said it was free.
Person #2: There must be some strings attached.
Person #1: Well, of course.
Person #2: It's not a free gift then, right?
Person #1: You had better take it... or else!
Person #2: Say what?
Person #1: Otherwise you will be incinerated!
Person #2: What sort of free gift is that?

Indeed.

]

 

[Wynona]

If you were on death row and destined for the electric chair, would you not consider it generous for someone to offer to go in your place?

Incineration and death is the default. No one is obligated to provide us a way out. Even if the way out involves self-denial.

It feels like this post was made only to vex and challenge Christians who believe in hell and the lake of fire. Are you interested in being challenged to the point where you might consider changing your own view?

Or are you just having a laugh at the expense of others? Those "dogmatic narrow minded" people who accept hell and the lake of fire?

 

[Jack]

Hell will be filled with people who don't believe in Hell.

Rev 20 They will be TORMENTED day and night FOREVER!

 

[St. SteVen]

If you were on death row and destined for the electric chair, would you not consider it generous for someone to offer to go in your place?

Incineration and death is the default. No one is obligated to provide us a way out. Even if the way out involves self-denial.

It feels like this post was made only to vex and challenge Christians who believe in hell and the lake of fire. Are you interested in being challenged to the point where you might consider changing your own view?

Or are you just having a laugh at the expense of others? Those "dogmatic narrow minded" people who accept hell and the lake of fire?

The church tells prospects (victims) that salvation is a free gift. Is that true?

]

 

[Jack]

The church tells prospects (victims) that salvation is a free gift. Is that true?

Christians are victims? How Satanic!

 

[St. SteVen]

--- PARODY ---

Person #1: That's against the law!
Person #2: Say what?
Person #1: What you are doing is against the law in Georgia.
Person #2: I'm not too concerned.
Person #1: Why not? !!!
Person #2: We're in Montana right now.
Person #1: That's no excuse!
Person #2: LOL

/

 

[Jack]

--- PARODY ---

Person #1: That's against the law!
Person #2: Say what?
Person #1: What you are doing is against the law in Georgia.
Person #2: I'm not too concerned.
Person #1: Why not? !!!
Person #2: We're in Montana right now.
Person #1: That's no excuse!
Person #2: LOL

/

You're trying to convince yourself?

 

[St. SteVen]

--- PARODY ---

Christian: God is love!
Prospect: What about the "hell" thing?
Christian: Oh, that's God's justice.
Prospect: How is that justice?
Christian: God has two sides.
Prospect: You mean he is two-faced, as in untrustworthy.
Christian: No, he is totally trustworthy.
Prospect: But aren't I currently in danger of hell?
Christian: Yes, but we can fix that?
Prospect: Fix it? Why is it even there if God is trustworthy?
Christian: Put your trust in Jesus and God will protect you.
Prospect: So, Jesus died to save me from God?
Christian: Well... I suppose he did...
Prospect: Are you nuts?

]

 

[Jack]

--- PARODY ---

Christian: God is love!
Prospect: What about the "hell" thing?
Christian: Oh, that's God's justice.
Prospect: How is that justice?
Christian: God has two sides.
Prospect: You mean he is two-faced, as in untrustworthy.
Christian: No, he is totally trustworthy.
Prospect: But aren't I currently in danger of hell?
Christian: Yes, but we can fix that?
Prospect: Fix it? Why is it even there if God is trustworthy?
Christian: Put your trust in Jesus and God will protect you.
Prospect: So, Jesus died to save me from God?
Christian: Well... I suppose he did...
Prospect: Are you nuts?

]

I Cor 6 Gays will burn in Hell Fire FOREVER!

 

[St. SteVen]

I Cor 6 Gays will burn in Hell Fire FOREVER!

You seem happy about that hate-filled statement.

]

 

[Jack]

You seem happy about that hate-filled statement.

Do you think Jesus was happy when He said gays will burn in Hell?

 

[St. SteVen]

Do you think Jesus was happy when He said gays will burn in Hell?

Did he actually say that?

]

 

[Jack]

Did he actually say that?

]

Yes He did. I Cor 6!

 

[St. SteVen]

Yes He did. I Cor 6!

That's a whole chapter. Could you be more specific? I don't see your claim supported there.

]

 

[Jack]

That's a whole chapter. Could you be more specific? I don't see your claim supported there.

]

Not my 'claim'. It's Jesus'! Gays will burn in Hell!

 

[Stash]

--- NON-PARODY ---

Me: God is love!
1)What about the "hell" thing?
Me: you mean blotted
2) what does blotted mean?
Me: separated from God
3) do I have to live with God
Me: No you have free will
4) no hell?
Me: no you won’t exist
5) that seems cruel
Me: You have a choice
6) I will pass
Me: I hope I planted a seed
7) maybe I’ll think about it
Me: I love you /God loves you
8) your strange
Me: you have a great day!
9) you also

Jesus:

 

[Jack]

Matthew 25:41
41 Then He will also say to those on the left hand, 'Depart from Me, you cursed, into the everlasting fire prepared for the devil and his angels:
Revelation 20:10
10 The devil, who deceived them, was cast into the lake of fire and brimstone where the beast and the false prophet are. And they will be tormented day and night forever and ever.

 

[St. SteVen]

--- NON-PARODY ---

Me: God is love!
1)What about the "hell" thing?
Me: you mean blotted
2) what does blotted mean?
Me: separated from God
3) do I have to live with God
Me: No you have free will
4) no hell?
Me: no you won’t exist
5) that seems cruel
Me: You have a choice
6) I will pass
Me: I hope I planted a seed
7) maybe I’ll think about it
Me: I love you /God loves you
8) your strange
Me: you have a great day!
9) you also

Jesus:

You should finish your post. What does Jesus say at the end? You left us hanging.

[

 

[St. SteVen]

--- PARODY ---

Christian: Do you believe in the Bible?
Skeptic: Who wrote the Books of Moses?
Christian: Well, Moses obviously. ???
Skeptic: If Adam wasn't a literal human then he didn't literally sin.
Christian: Adam's transgression was the original sin.
Skeptic: If Adam didn't literally sin, then there is no original sin.
Christian: We were all born sinners.
Skeptic: If there is no original sin then being born in Adam's race does not make you a sinner.
Christian: Well... ???
Skeptic: If we are not redeemed from original sin by Christ's payment of the death penalty...
Christian: I suppose, but...
Skeptic: Then the Atonement was of none effect.
Christian: Say what?
Skeptic: If the Atonement was of none effect, we are lost in our sin and awaiting judgment of our works.
Christian: That can't be right... ???
Skeptic: We all fall short of the perceived standard and stand condemned.
Christian: Well, yes, but...
Skeptic: Faith in Christ can't help us, the Atonement is null and void.
Christian: What? !!!
Skeptic: Where does that leave us?
Christian: We need to take the Genesis account as literal history.
Skeptic: Indications are that it is a mythology.
Christian: A mythology means it isn't true!
Skeptic: There is your problem.

[

 

[MA2444]

--- PARODY ---

Person #1: Receive the free gift of eternal life.
Person #2: No thanks.
Person #1: I said it was free.
Person #2: There must be some strings attached.
Person #1: Well, of course.
Person #2: It's not a free gift then, right?
Person #1: You had better take it... or else!
Person #2: Say what?
Person #1: Otherwise you will be incinerated!
Person #2: What sort of free gift is that?

Indeed.

]

Now I'm not sure if you are really Christian or not? Are you? Or thinking of changing to a different religion or what?

That's a weird question.