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Ritajanice

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This old mindset of ours is a dang pain in the butt for sure.

Help us renew our minds Lord so that we think and act as Jesus would when speaking with each other...

In Jesus Name!...Amen!
 
J

Johann

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If you are going to do that, why stop there?

"I" versus "You" Statements (more at the link)

WHAT IS A “YOU-STATEMENT?”​

“You-statements,” such as those listed above, are phrases that begin with the pronoun “you” and imply that the listener is responsible for something. They show no ownership of emotions, but rather blame, accuse and assume the receiver. By blaming others for something in your life, you are giving away your power. You begin to adopt a victim mentality. This type of statement is more likely to make your partner feel defensive and resentful, and he or she will be less likely to want to make peace.

WHAT IS AN “I-STATEMENT?”​

An “I-statement,” on the other hand, forces us to take responsibility for what we are thinking and feeling and prevents us from blaming our partners. Phrasing statements beginning with "I" places the power in your hands. When using “I-statements,” we become empowered and can still be assertive, but find a less hostile, more compassionate way to communicate.

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN “YOU-STATEMENTS” AND “I-STATEMENTS”

“You-statements” are often used to assert blame and even punish your partner, consciously or unconsciously. By pointing out what they’ve done wrong or how they’ve made you feel upset, sad or angry, you’re either trying to make them feel as bad as you feel or you’re trying to make them change. Neither is a part of creating a healthy relationship nor creating an opportunity to come together.

An “I-statement,” on the other hand, shows personal accountability and open-mindedness. It states that even though your partner is not acting or speaking in the way you’d prefer, you are not blaming him or her for how you feel. When using “I-statements,” you take responsibility for the part you played in the disagreement and display the openness for deep listening and resolution.

Much love!
Give me an example-say if I'm dead wrong on Cessationism how would you go about to correct me? If I'm correct and you disagree, how do I go about correcting you without coming across as "angry?"
 

marks

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Give me an example-say if I'm dead wrong on Cessationism how would you go about to correct me? If I'm correct and you disagree, how do I go about correcting you without coming across as "angry?"
Concerning the "you" vs. "I" statements,

"You are ignoring the Scriptures"
"I find this Scripture answers this point"

"You don't get it"
"Let me put this another way"

"You are using carnal understanding"
"I see this passage telling us . . ."

"You are desparate . . ."
"that's how you choose to read it"
"you keep saying all this crap"

"I'm having a hard time seeing how this is relevant"
"I don't see that being said here"


It's not like I can't say "you" without crossing the line, it's what the intent of the statement is. If we are in a peer discussion, this isn't really an issue so much, more so during controversy and disagreement. I see this as a control thing, as a means to "strongarm" the discussion. Or sometimes just throw rocks.

Much love!
 
J

Johann

Guest
Concerning the "you" vs. "I" statements,

"You are ignoring the Scriptures"
"I find this Scripture answers this point"

"You don't get it"
"Let me put this another way"

"You are using carnal understanding"
"I see this passage telling us . . ."

"You are desparate . . ."
"that's how you choose to read it"
"you keep saying all this crap"

"I'm having a hard time seeing how this is relevant"
"I don't see that being said here"


It's not like I can't say "you" without crossing the line, it's what the intent of the statement is. If we are in a peer discussion, this isn't really an issue so much, more so during controversy and disagreement. I see this as a control thing, as a means to "strongarm" the discussion. Or sometimes just throw rocks.

Much love!
I find a face to face conversation much more edifying-in real time and no need to "steel-man" my argument-my dear wife always cautioned me to always respond and never react, that way I remain in control.

I look at the body language, the eyes, the shifting, the posture of the person etc. a valuable lesson learned from the Ark in Durban.
J.
 

Ritajanice

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Blaming and blame shifting are also part of this.

Much love!
Well, I only had myself to blame...I was saying crap on nearly every thread...

I’m glad you brought it to our attention, as it’s made me look at my behaviour on the thread. “ again “ so thanks for posting what you said..it’s made me take a step back “ again “ I may take a break from the forum...I need to do a bit of heart searching if that makes sense...I’m certainly taking a break from getting involved in these controversial threads...
 
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Eternally Grateful

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You have just voiced your own opinion of me falsely accusing people.

I have made no false accusations..in my opinion.
You can believe you have done nothing wrong all you want.

I have proven your false accusations by quoting your own words..

Your words condemn you as they say.. I do not have to do anything.
 

Ritajanice

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You can believe you have done nothing wrong all you want.

I have proven your false accusations by quoting your own words..

Your words condemn you as they say.. I do not have to do anything.
Keep the ball rolling!! and the fire burning...you’re being well and truly used, if you can’t see it I can.

Bye ,Bye..
 

Eternally Grateful

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Scripture says that is not how we are Born Of The Spirit..just as Jesus explains beautifully to Nicodemus on how we are Born Again...not saved , Born Again.
and here is another issue Rita does not understand that in order to be born again, we must first be saved (from the penalty of sin)

and yes. Jesus explains it quite clearly. But you ignore those words..
 

Eternally Grateful

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I’m afraid the Gospel doesn’t make our spirit Born Again...only Gods Spirit can do that just as His word says.

Of course those without the Spirit would understand none of these spiritual words..they would be folly to them.

Hearing anyone preach the gospel does not make one’s spirit Born Again..that is a supernatural/spiritual act that only God can perform if it’s his will to do so..we are Born Again of Gods seed, that is by Gods Witness His Living Holy Spirit....

Only the Father can draw us to Jesus by His Holy Spirit Power none can stop being chosen and predestined by God to become Born Again...mind Blowing!

My opinion/ testimony and belief.
I just can't.

can anyone help this person??

The gospel is HOW we are born again, The good news of Jesus.. the gospel that saves.
 

Ritajanice

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and here is another issue Rita does not understand that in order to be born again, we must first be saved (from the penalty of sin)

and yes. Jesus explains it quite clearly. But you ignore those words..
All of my posts stand regarding being Born Of The Spirit...I have my belief and you have yours.

Your belief is no more valid than my belief or anyone else’s...now are you going to let this rest?
 

Eternally Grateful

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None of this scripture has anything to do with a Born Again ...what are you so desperately trying to prove to me...you say you are Born Again and that your soul is going to heaven...that’s your belief...it’s just not mine...so I’m not sure what you are trying to prove....

A New Heart and Spirit
…25I will also sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean. I will cleanse you from all your impurities and all your idols. 26I will give you a new heart and put a new spiritwithin you; I will remove your heart of stoneand give you a heart of flesh. 27And I will put My Spirit within you and cause you to walk in My statutes and to carefully observe My ordinances.…
Berean Standard Bible · Download



What does Gods word say...only a Born Again will see the Kingdom Of God....there you have it.

That scripture you posted is what you believe, that your soul is going to heaven,..I know where my spirit will be, with God as his Spirit indwells my spirit.

Your belief is different to mine....no problem, I post what I believe the word of God to be speaking to my heart.

I’m not sure who you think leads you through scripture...as you told me the Spirit doesn’t lead me through scripture.

So, who leads you through God’s spiritual book to bring it to your understanding in your spirit as that’s where we’re Born Again?
what a joke

You said show you where a soul goes to heaven

I showed you

and instead of admitting you were wrong. You had to defend yourself by again changing the subject.

You are in serious need of some humble pie,
 

Ritajanice

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I just can't.

can anyone help this person??

The gospel is HOW we are born again, The good news of Jesus.. the gospel that saves.
You have posted what you believe...I 100 % disagree with your belief and you 100% disagree with my belief..now are you going to let this go?

Or have I got to report your continuous bullying me to believe as you believe..I don’t and 100% never will.

Are we done?
 

Eternally Grateful

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There is no conflict at all about when a person is born again.
You are born again, then you are a believer, will be a believer as you will have God granted faith in Christ.
You cannot prove a person is born again after they believe.
This is serious error

This has a person, who is dead because of tresspasses and sins, made alive while still under the penalty of sin, before the penalty is removed by justification through faith.

I suggest people learn about the character of God.. because people are misunderstanding who and what is
 

Eternally Grateful

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Actually, this is the plain wording of John 1, that we believe, we receive, and THEN comes rebirth.

Much love!
John 3 says it also

whoever believes will never perish (they have literally passed from death to life) and this life is eternal (eternal life)
 

marks

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John 3 says it also

whoever believes will never perish (they have literally passed from death to life) and this life is eternal (eternal life)
This also uses active voice verbs, showing the person is believing, not that God is causing them to believe, which would have to be written in the passive voice.

Much love!
 
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Ritajanice

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what a joke

You said show you where a soul goes to heaven

I showed you

and instead of admitting you were wrong. You had to defend yourself by again changing the subject.

You are in serious need of some humble pie,
No, I disagreed with your belief system it’s one 100% opposite to mine.

What you posted has nothing to do with being Born Again.

Only a Born Again will see the Kingdom Of God.

The Spirit indwells my spirit and when my body dies, I will see God in his full Glory..Spirit to spirit.
 

Eternally Grateful

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That is how you have chosen to read it.
it plainly says it differently than how you have read it.

v13 qualifies the understanding of the preceding verses, as ' who were born ' is past tense, meaning it already happened prior as in came before verses 10-12.

10 He was in the world, and the world was made through Him, and the world did not know Him.
11 He came to His [c]own, and His [d]own did not receive Him.
12 But as many as received Him, to them He gave the [e]right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name:

13 who were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God.
It says they recieved him

They were not born of the will of man, amen, I could not will you to salvation, God must save you, and he tells us how. By recieving him.. that gives us the power to become Gods children (born again into his family)