Wives - "I Don't Want To Lose My Voice, My Power, Or My Identity"

[Wynona]

"I Don't Want To Lose My Voice, My Power, Or My Identity"

"I write for wives. I don’t talk about what husbands “should do.” We can’t control anyone but ourselves. I spent 14 years focusing on what my husband should do and focusing on his failures – all the while ignoring my own sin. That left me a powerless victim, always demanding that he change. He never talked about that I had hurt him – so I thought he was fine. I had no idea how much my criticizing, scolding, bossing him around, dictating to him what to do, arguing, complaining and thinking I was right all the time and he was wrong all the time – had hurt him. All I knew was I was stressed, worried and lonely. Obviously, that was not a great recipe for a loving, wonderful marriage.

Now we have the marriage I always wanted to have. My power was in looking at my own end of the relationship and what God commands me to do as a wife and as a believer in Christ. "

---April Cassidy

 

[Wynona]

The truth is, trying to push, nag, and manipulate our husbands into being who they should be never works and leaves us further enslaved to our evil thoughts, bitterness, addictions, and emotions.

We can always point the finger at our husbands and point out what they ought to be doing but this stunts our own growth into forming Christ in us.

Learning to respect my husband increased his respect for me. My voice became more powerful, not less. And by stepping back, He could more easily hear directly from the Lord about who he was meant to be as man and as a husband.

 

[Wynona]

Is a Christian Wife Supposed to Be a Doormat?

"I seek to be like the Proverbs 31 wife. Not a passive wallflower. We tend to swing from one fleshly extreme to the other. Dominating and take-charge or passive and weak. But God can give us His supernatural power to balance in the healthy middle.

It takes incredible spiritual strength to be a godly wife God’s way. It takes the power of the Holy Spirit, dying to self, and living in my new nature in Christ.
(It takes all of that to be a godly husband, too.)

I share my concerns respectfully and in a friendly way. I even confront sin in my husband’s life, if needed, in ways that honor the Lord and honor my husband.**"

---April Cassidy peacefulwife.com

 

[Wynona]

 

[Wynona]

 

[Windmill Charge]

"Don't Want To Lose My Voice, My Power, Or My Identity"

I think one needs to know just what ones identity is?

Are you just a daughter, or a sister?

What is the identity of a wife or a mother?

How does they compare, a.lthough one will never stop being a daughter and a sister, having gained additional identities.

Voice and power! Nothing compares to the voice or the power of a wife and mother when roused.

 

[Wynona]

Voice and power! Nothing compares to the voice or the power of a wife and mother when roused.

Women as wives and mothers have trendous power. We can use it to build up or tear down.

 

[Lizbeth]

Marriage for the wife in many ways mirrors the relationship of the believer with the Lord. A cross to carry. And giving up our things that pertain to self like identity, own power, voice etc, as it were, to serve and reflect Him. We are no longer our own but were bought with a price (bride-price). It's no longer about "me" but "us".

Just like we need to surrender all that we have and are to the Lord we need to learn to surrender our spouses and marriages to Him as well. Trust that He is working it all together for our spiritual good. God knows the Way that we take. So true what you said there sister, the more we get out of the way and step back the more God is in charge.

 

[Wynona]

Marriage for the wife in many ways mirrors the relationship of the believer with the Lord. A cross to carry. And giving up our things that pertain to self like identity, own power, voice etc, as it were, to serve and reflect Him. We are no longer our own but were bought with a price (bride-price). It's no longer about "me" but "us".

Just like we need to surrender all that we have and are to the Lord we need to learn to surrender our spouses and marriages to Him as well. Trust that He is working it all together for our spiritual good. God knows the Way that we take. So true what you said there sister, the more we get out of the way and step back the more God is in charge.

Absolutely! Well put!

 

[Wynona]