Inheritance Tax AKA Family Feud

[JohnDB]

No....not discussing anything to do with our Government.

But apparently it has become a thing. If you have a relative who leaves you something in their will.....

Get ready for a huge battle within your family.
Will shmill.....it doesn't seem to matter whatsoever....your siblings, aunts and uncles will battle for whatever you were designated to have. And if it is not a law firm dispersing the assets....do NOT expect even your own mother to tell you that your deceased relative left you anything.

Inheritance Tax is the battle you go through when someone has anything of value to leave you when they die.


Any stories you wish to share?

 

[DuckieLady]

No....not discussing anything to do with our Government.

But apparently it has become a thing. If you have a relative who leaves you something in their will.....

Get ready for a huge battle within your family.
Will shmill.....it doesn't seem to matter whatsoever....your siblings, aunts and uncles will battle for whatever you were designated to have. And if it is not a law firm dispersing the assets....do NOT expect even your own mother to tell you that your deceased relative left you anything.

Inheritance Tax is the battle you go through when someone has anything of value to leave you when they die.


Any stories you wish to share?

I have two sides of the family. There's the poor side and then there's the wealthy side. It was just the wealthy side trying to stop the poor side from hoarding everything, because they just take, take, take.

I wasn't able to grieve because nobody could keep it together and I was already in survival mode for other reasons. I didn't involve myself. I just watched the chaos.

People just get so overwhelmed from losing someone they think everything they had is that person and it's not true. It won't make them stay.

 

[JohnDB]

I have two sides of the family. There's the poor side and then there's the wealthy side. It was just the wealthy side trying to stop the poor side from hoarding everything, because they just take, take, take.

I wasn't able to grieve because nobody could keep it together and I was already in survival mode for other reasons. I didn't involve myself. I just watched the chaos.

People just get so overwhelmed from losing someone they think everything they had is that person and it's not true. It won't make them stay.

Oh....
But some are just greedy....they are the poster children of 2Timothy 3.

And you are always wondering if it was something you did
OR
if there was something you could have done that would have made them behave better.

But the truth is always that they did this to themselves. Nobody made them be this way. The loved one is gone. The relationship has ended here on earth. And those trinkets and money left behind aren't them. They are like any other junk....destined to perish eventually.

50-60 year's ago $100 was a substantial sum. Today, you do well getting out of a fast food joint for that with a family of 4.

And in 50 years a single meal will need more $$ to be sufficient to cover the cost.

 

[DuckieLady]

Oh....
But some are just greedy....they are the poster children of 2Timothy 3.

And you are always wondering if it was something you did
OR
if there was something you could have done that would have made them behave better.

But the truth is always that they did this to themselves. Nobody made them be this way. The loved one is gone. The relationship has ended here on earth. And those trinkets and money left behind aren't them. They are like any other junk....destined to perish eventually.

50-60 year's ago $100 was a substantial sum. Today, you do well getting out of a fast food joint for that with a family of 4.

And in 50 years a single meal will need more $$ to be sufficient to cover the cost.

I tell my son if you have a good relationship with God and you keep yourself in good health, you are already one of the richest people in the world. Along with that, peace of mind and good family is enough.

 

[Lambano]

Any stories you wish to share?

I'm grateful that when Mom died, her will designated my sister as the executor, not me. Sis did a creditable job making sure Mom's wishes got carried out, and making sure everybody got treated fairly.

Now, my grandmother and my mother-in-law had a few stories about some family feuds, where Aunt H. ended up not talking to her sister for the rest of her life over a dispute about who got great-grandma's diamond wedding ring, and searching underneath the house for the money they were sure grandpa had squirreled away, and so on. Humanity not-at-its-finest.

 

[Bob]

Thank you for your post.

Here is a good story.

When our mother died (89), my younger sister had been taking care of her. Mom had portioned out her savings among us but deeded her house to my sister. No one had any issues.

After the memorial service we gathered to discuss all of Mom’s classic furniture, paintings, dishes, etc. My sister showed us pictures of everything and asked, “Ok, who would like what?” There were zero disputes; in fact, it was more of each us urging one another to accept an item where it seemed appropriate. As a result, grandchildren were gifted some lovely furniture and paintings.

We were merry and laughed a lot. Our mother was a wonderful person, and we knew she was now in the comfort of God’s arms.

Why no discord? None of us are die-hard materialists. God, family, and friends come first.

Blessings.

 

[JohnDB]

Thank you for your post.

Here is a good story.

When our mother died (89), my younger sister had been taking care of her. Mom had portioned out her savings among us but deeded her house to my sister. No one had any issues.

After the memorial service we gathered to discuss all of Mom’s classic furniture, paintings, dishes, etc. My sister showed us pictures of everything and asked, “Ok, who would like what?” There were zero disputes; in fact, it was more of each us urging one another to accept an item where it seemed appropriate. As a result, grandchildren were gifted some lovely furniture and paintings.

We were merry and laughed a lot. Our mother was a wonderful person, and we knew she was now in the comfort of God’s arms.

Why no discord? None of us are die-hard materialists. God, family, and friends come first.

Blessings.

Not even that "one guy" in the family is a true rarity.

In my family....we are just the reverse. We have 2 that are not materialists (I'm one of the not materialists) while the rest absolutely are. They want every dime they think they can get by any means possible. One even wanting an Inheritance before his parents are dead. (As if, and currently angry and pouting that he isn't getting it)
I currently believe that my own mother withheld an Inheritance from my grandparents to me because she could get away with it as the executor....I really don't care about the money...just the emotions of greed being more important than her own son. It sucks, but she is currently answering for her sins. And I do not have to allow those sins be generational in nature. However, I did score Grandma's cookie jar. To me, it's better than money...although it is something of a collector's item for those "Anti-Disney" people and worth something to them.

But Grandma's cookie jar is a priceless relic of "purloined" oreos and other cookies homemade with loving hands and always full. I can still remove the lid and replace it today without so much as one clink of porcelain on porcelain. Cash has no context and never will.

 

[Windmill Charge]

Thank you for your post.

Here is a good story.

When our mother died (89), my younger sister had been taking care of her. Mom had portioned out her savings among us but deeded her house to my sister. No one had any issues.

After the memorial service we gathered to discuss all of Mom’s classic furniture, paintings, dishes, etc. My sister showed us pictures of everything and asked, “Ok, who would like what?” There were zero disputes; in fact, it was more of each us urging one another to accept an item where it seemed appropriate. As a result, grandchildren were gifted some lovely furniture and paintings.

We were merry and laughed a lot. Our mother was a wonderful person, and we knew she was now in the comfort of God’s arms.

Why no discord? None of us are die-hard materialists. God, family, and friends come first.

Blessings.

A varient of this was done by my Dad's Mother. She had put labels on most furniture to indicate to who it would go to. This greatly amused my brother in law who would lift vases p.ates etc and comment ' not coming to us!'

When she down sized fro her large victoriana house to a small apartment, most of her possessions were passed on or sold preventing most disputes about inheritance.

P.S. A side issue, do talk to elderly relatives about what they want for a funeral.
Get them to put this in writing together with any requests for a fu oral service.
My Dad used to drive me mad, repeatedly telling me where his fu real service was.
But when he died having a cd with a complete order of service, including pictures made coping far easier.
That and having a prepaid funeral plan. I had to make three visits.
One to the undertaker, one to the vicar of his CoE churh and one to a printer. Very easy everything was done.

 

[mailmandan]

Does an inheritance need to be a large amount before it can be taxed? My wife has a friend that lost her mother who left behind $200,000. The money was supposed to be divided between my wife's friend and her sister but somehow her aunt (mother's sister) who had control of her bank account and was supposed to divide the money between the two sisters instead, just took the money and ran! Now my wife's friend is going to sue her aunt. Ugly situation!