I don't think I'm a Christian

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Pisteuo

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I would say your relationship and closeness to God has nothing to do with other Christians. It is a personal one. But I too have struggled watching "christians" be more un-christian than those whose claim nothing. But most of what I've witnessed is that those claiming to be Christian had no idea what Christ was like. And usually with no desire to find out. I actually had this conversation with God about 6 years ago. I told Him how I felt about going to a church that was void of love and how I didn't see the blessing in that. (I know, pretty self-centered prayer there, huh?) Yet He was kind to me and laid on my heart that day that if I couldn't see a blessing then I should be a blessing and as long as you are there then there should be love as well.
 

Addy

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lol...you're a funny one!
Was that a compliment... an insult or simply an observation??? LOL

If you are referring to my comment about waving at the children... Cristo has discovered where he has recently migrated to ... that people seem to wave alot... LOL... So I have been telling him to keep waving to the children... they like that... LOL

But yes... I am a funny one...
 
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quietthinker

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Was that a compliment... an insult or simply an observation??? LOL
whew...someone who admits they don't understand what was said and asks. No insult Addy, just identification with your frustration and seeing the funny side of 'recluse'

Oddly, I find myself a bit reclusive also mainly because I'm weary of the repetitive ego stroking, self justifying, haven't I got it together attitudes but then realise all of us are a bunch of sick puppies easily bent out of shape.
 
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Daniel Veler

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Christ tells us that many will say in that day. Lord, Lord have I not cast out devils in your name. Have I not taught in your name. Have I not eaten supper with you. But he will say to them depart from me I never knew you. Now if you truly understood eternal life you would know why Christ said I never knew you.
 

quietthinker

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Christ tells us that many will say in that day. Lord, Lord have I not cast out devils in your name. Have I not taught in your name. Have I not eaten supper with you. But he will say to them depart from me I never knew you. Now if you truly understood eternal life you would know why Christ said I never knew you.
I think I'll let Jesus determine who he says that to. In the interim I don't need to concern myself with it.
 
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Cristo Rei

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What I have found has repulsed me and offended me deeply.... On these forums there are many I will not lower myself to speak to because all
they like to do is twist words and argue...

This is why I am a RECLUSE.... I do not trust any human... I believe God is ok with this... I need SIMPLICITY... I need PEACE...and I am just beginning to experience JOY... I don't get along with many who claim to be Christian... I find them to be nothing more than harsh judges and condemners.

Keep it simple... stay away from opinions... keep waving to the children... and ENJOY the birds... God will reveal HIMSELF to you...

Im thinking of starting up bird watching. Im not very patient but with things like fishing but i am so overjoyed at just watching birds in the wild.

Everyone like nature documentaries, right... Have u ever thought about how they get some of those pictures?
Those guys are grand master monks... They crib out in tiny hides for days, waiting for that magic moment, if their lucky.

Me, im just a keen observer atm. Any bird i will look to see what it is... Its usually a regular
Theres a lot of road kill and there are usually crows around it, but the other day these two birds weren't crows. So i did a u turn and slowly rolled into a nice position, 15-20 meters, no closer cos one had flown off and the other was watching me... It was a raptor of some kind, a bird of prey, FEEDING on the side of the road... Oh man, awesome.

I grabbed my camera but as i began to film a car drove by and spooked it into a nearby tree... I spent the next 45 mins just watching the meat and the tree, a stake out. But cars kept driving by which didn't help.
It was getting dark so i decided to get out of the car and flank this tree on foot cos i thought the bird was still in it... And it was. It spotted me and flew out around me making a warning cry. It swept wide around me almost 360 making a 2nd cry as it disappeared into the bush. What a tease

Im not good enough to identify the bird. I can only narrow it down to a few suspects. It looks like the bird in my avatar.
Maybe a kestrel, a brown falcon or a hobby but here are just so many birds, i don't know all of them... LoL
 

Addy

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whew...someone who admits they don't understand what was said and asks. No insult Addy, just identification with your frustration and seeing the funny side of 'recluse'

Oddly, I find myself a bit reclusive also mainly because I'm weary of the repetitive ego stroking, self justifying, haven't I got it together attitudes but then realise all of us are a bunch of sick puppies easily bent out of shape.
LOL @sick puppies bent of out shape.... It's funny... other names come to my mind... :rolleyes:
 

Addy

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Im thinking of starting up bird watching. Im not very patient but with things like fishing but i am so overjoyed at just watching birds in the wild.

Everyone like nature documentaries, right... Have u ever thought about how they get some of those pictures?
Those guys are grand master monks... They crib out in tiny hides for days, waiting for that magic moment, if their lucky.

Me, im just a keen observer atm. Any bird i will look to see what it is... Its usually a regular
Theres a lot of road kill and there are usually crows around it, but the other day these two birds weren't crows. So i did a u turn and slowly rolled into a nice position, 15-20 meters, no closer cos one had flown off and the other was watching me... It was a raptor of some kind, a bird of prey, FEEDING on the side of the road... Oh man, awesome.

I grabbed my camera but as i began to film a car drove by and spooked it into a nearby tree... I spent the next 45 mins just watching the meat and the tree, a stake out. But cars kept driving by which didn't help.
It was getting dark so i decided to get out of the car and flank this tree on foot cos i thought the bird was still in it... And it was. It spotted me and flew out around me making a warning cry. It swept wide around me almost 360 making a 2nd cry as it disappeared into the bush. What a tease

Im not good enough to identify the bird. I can only narrow it down to a few suspects. It looks like the bird in my avatar.
Maybe a kestrel, a brown falcon or a hobby but here are just so many birds, i don't know all of them... LoL

I will take this as one of your updates.... HOW lovely that you have found something that you enjoy so profoundly...
I know that there are books you can get that identify birds with pictures in them according to geography... but I'm sure you
are more than aware of this too.

I think I shared with you that I live on the lake... but my location geographically is BORING... LOL... so all we get are crows/ravens....
I think the ravens are bigger than the crows... seagulls... and the odd wood pecker... I too love looking at them... but I am more interested in
flowers...

What patience these wildlife photographers have.... to sit for hours and hours on end to get ... as you say... that magic moment.
I have watched MANY nature shows... the ones that amaze me the most are the underwater ones... Jacques Cousteau started it all...
and now the rest is history.

I encourage you to just SOAK it all in my dear brother... I am so delighted to hear of your journey...

Blessings to you... Tenderly... Addy
 
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APAK

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I believe God exists
I believe Satan exists

Aside from that I have no other firm beliefs.
I'm actually back to when I encountered Satan and God and I'm comfortable about it

CR, I see you are on your journey as others, who are 'working out' their salvation. Do not be deterred by obstacles along the way. Pray meaningful prayers along the way for guidance and wisdom. Keep on moving forward and try to be patient will yourself....you know that bird watching and photography combo hobby is a great way to see how our creator has made creatures as unique individuals with different personalities, as you and me are unique in many ways. We are though children of God and love the Lord. Yes we see scripture and Christendom differently and we will always in different ways, although we have Christ with us in one common unity.

Yes, I've had managed to be entangled and lost in the thorns and thistles of life from time to time. A few of these episodes were long, difficult and even life changing. However I always found my way back to the path of glory and salvation. Doubting in being human. Even Christ had doubts along his path and mission to glory.

Always in kindness and love brother. you are not a defeatist and a quitter. No one ever said being a true follower of Christ was going to be easy. It is not, as we are an 'odd' species indeed.

Blessing to you from our common Father and Saviour and to heck with the accuser of the brethren I say. He is nothing and has no part in your life and future when it is all said and done.

Brotherly love always, be PATIENT and pray a bit....

APAK
 

lforrest

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Many things. I only just came back to God 2 or 3 years ago. That's when i felt closest to Him.
Then i found that Christianity wasn't exactly what i thought it was and scripture is not so easy to interpret.
44,000 denominations. All bickering and claiming to have the one and only gospel. Plus all the individuals with other interpretations...
And thats not to mention all the other religions that claim the same.

Who am i to correctly discern the truth, with this feeble human mind, im bound to make an error.
So i keep it simple. Too many unanswered questions. The deeper i get into doctrine the mot twisted and complicated it becomes

Did God only appear to the Jews? What about the countless other cultures in the world? Damned?
Christ is the son of God but aren't we all? How can a man be God. How can the father be the son?
And how does dying on the cross save us... So much of it makes no sense to me.

Are we save by this or that... I don't know... Its such a paradoxical debate it just makes my head spin
Everyone claiming to know the truth but i don't anyone really knows the whole truth or even a fraction of it.

Only things that do make sense to me is God, Satan and our soul.



No bitterness towards anyone from me
I don't think all denominations consider their differences essential, such as the Protestants. But many have, of their own accord, such as Catholics. And some are when they lead people to a different Jesus, having been infiltrated or founded on demonic doctrines. So long as people are saved, they can be corrected on everything else in heaven. Though it may have been helpful to know everything perhaps it isn't always important.

Most of these questions I asked God over a decade ago during a short period of fasting and studying his word. The answers became evident then.

God didn't appear only to the Jews, but to many. But it was only through the Jews that his word was preserved. For most the prophesies didn't leave their oracles mouths without having been corrupted, and then those words were subjected to the whims of those in power. They are under the power and authority of those on earth and of the air. Such as the long forgotten kingdom called Salem, even though it worshiped God... They were lost to history, I assume Polytheism overtook them. They had not the faith, promises or blessings of Abraham.
 

marks

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Who is right. I dunno.
In my bedroom, with my Bible, in the middle of the night, that's where I came to know God. Years after being born again, but never really come to know Him. Until I was desparate.

No one is right, we are all wrong. But God is never wrong, and will never lead you wrong.

For me, underneath everything, I desire good and not evil, and I'm trusting God to deliver me. If you want to know Him, look for Him. You will find Him.

Much love!
 

Riverwalker

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That is the inevitable result of trying to grasp God with our mind. We can't to it. We have to let go the constraints of the mind and embrace the possibilities beyond us

Part of being saved is the humbling of yourself to the submission to God. If you have your own set of standards, your own set of priorities and requirement you will never find God. You have to set those aside, get on your knees and believe

Proverbs 3:5
Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
6 In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.

7 Do not be wise in your own eyes;
 
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Cristo Rei

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To be honest, i thought i was going to get lectured and badgered but i am overwhelmed by the kind words from everyone.

God bless you all
 

CadyandZoe

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Many things. I only just came back to God 2 or 3 years ago. That's when i felt closest to Him.
Then i found that Christianity wasn't exactly what i thought it was and scripture is not so easy to interpret.
44,000 denominations. All bickering and claiming to have the one and only gospel. Plus all the individuals with other interpretations...
And thats not to mention all the other religions that claim the same.

Who am i to correctly discern the truth, with this feeble human mind, im bound to make an error.
So i keep it simple. Too many unanswered questions. The deeper i get into doctrine the mot twisted and complicated it becomes

Did God only appear to the Jews? What about the countless other cultures in the world? Damned?
Christ is the son of God but aren't we all? How can a man be God. How can the father be the son?
And how does dying on the cross save us... So much of it makes no sense to me.

Are we save by this or that... I don't know... Its such a paradoxical debate it just makes my head spin
Everyone claiming to know the truth but i don't anyone really knows the whole truth or even a fraction of it.

Only things that do make sense to me is God, Satan and our soul.



No bitterness towards anyone from me
Would Jesus be a Christian? I don't think so. You are right, the Christianity of today isn't what he or the apostles would recognize. At the same time, however, there are small groups of faithful followers of Jesus that exist, where he and the apostles would feel very comfortable.

You say you believe that Satan exists. Well, I can say with all confidence that you have had personal experience with Satan, if you didn't know it. Only Satan or those who work for him, cause someone to doubt their own mind. People who cause us to doubt ourselves are enemies and want do destroy us. Your lack of confidence that anything can be known is personal for you. If I were to guess, I would say that you experienced a traumatic event that forced you to doubt everything. Am I right?

Can I tell you a personal story? When I was about ten years old, my parents got a divorce. This situation hit me very hard and I cried myself to sleep for many nights. It wasn't until years later that I was able to articulate what I had experienced. As a child, I grew up thinking the world was run by immutable laws that couldn't be broken. One of those "laws" that I assumed would never change was having two loving parents, a mother and a father. When that "law" proved to be alterable I was shaken down to the very core of my existence. I lost faith in everything and I doubted everything. I trusted no one. I questioned everything. Even when someone would tell me their name, in the back of my mind I would think, "maybe it is; maybe it isn't." Even when my teachers would say, "the capital of France is Paris" I would say to myself, "okay, if you say so. I can find it on a map but I have never actually been there."

But like you, I never doubted that God existed. Later, when a teenager, I had suicidal thoughts. I would walk around wondering if anyone would miss me when I was gone. By this time, my father left me, my mother left me, my girlfriend left me and I was feeling very alone. One day, I was walking around the neighborhood contemplating the method I might employ when I fixed my gaze up to the sky and said (out loud), "God, if you exist, then show me." And at that time, I honestly thought I was speaking into the air and I didn't think much about it. But that day I decided to table the idea of suicide, just in case I might get an answer.

One day, I got a letter from my girlfriend, the one who moved far away, telling me she had found Jesus and to expect a note from her pastor. A few days later I got a letter from her pastor and included in the package was a pocket New Testament. The note says to turn to this page and when I turned to that page I found an underlined verse and a note to turn to such-and-such page. Many, many years later I discovered this to be "The Romans Road" to salvation. Anyway, what impressed me a bit more about this experience was not the verses per se, but the fact that a stranger from across the country would care enough about me to send me a gift and letter of concern. Suddenly I discovered my first immutable law: "love". actual, pure, unadulterated, self-sacrificial love. This was evident in my former girlfriend, her pastor and it permeated the entire New Testament.

If you ever get a chance, listen to a song written by Keith Green called "Your Love Broke Through". That song perfectly describes my initial experience with God's love and grace. Even after all these years, I can't hold back the tears.

Anyway, if you believe God exists, then believe that love exists, which is one more thing you can add to your list of things that are real.

Edit:
Found it.
 
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Cristo Rei

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I guess one of the biggest questions is who was Jesus praying to in the garden before getting arrested???

If he was God then why was he praying to himself??? It indicates that he is praying to a God, above him.

Jesus' words are often metaphorical, he often speaks in parables... His actions here are easy to interpret and unmistakable

When Jesus was most afraid, in his darkest hours, he prayed to God for strength...

He also spoke to God on the cross and in the desert in think and maybe some other times too...

Jesus' actions indicate there is a greater God unless there is an adequate explanation to this. Is there
How can this be explained?
 
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Cristo Rei

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On the moral side of things i would still say that i adhere to Christian morality
 

stunnedbygrace

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I guess one of the biggest questions is who was Jesus praying to in the garden before getting arrested???

If he was God then why was he praying to himself??? It indicates that he is praying to a God, above him.

Jesus' words are often metaphorical, he often speaks in parables... His actions here are easy to interpret...

When Jesus was most afraid, in his darkest hours, he prayed to God for strength...

He also spoke to God on the cross and in the desert in think and maybe some other times too...

Jesus' actions indicate there is a greater God, in spirit.

When Jesus became human, He WAS praying to God. He had to rely on God for everything, just as we do.

I'm not convinced you are in a bad place. I rather think you are in a good place to have realized you know nothing. I dont think a man comes to that realization without God working in him. And I dont think he comes to that realization unless God is drawing him closer. And, strange as it sounds, you cant sense God during the times when He is working the most in you. It feels more like He's abandoned you rather than that He is giving you more light and burning off impurities and ignorances.

Consider the beings Ezekiel saw. They went wherever the Spirit went but they didnt do this by their own power and in fact, their eyes were darkened because two of their wings covered their eyes, so you could say they knew nothing and saw nothing (as you have described about yourself), but instead went by dark trust of God. They covered their feet also, so with their own will they would not try to go somewhere other than where the Spirit went.

These beings show us a lot!
 

Daniel Veler

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I think I'll let Jesus determine who he says that to. In the interim I don't need to concern myself with it.
Christ is teaching us those that know him and he and the Father dwells in them are not denied. But those that have acknowledgment only have not the relationship which is defined as eternal life.
 

stunnedbygrace

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Christ is teaching us those that know him and he and the Father dwells in them are not denied. But those that have acknowledgment only have not the relationship which is defined as eternal life.

I would caution you to move forward carefully, Daniel. You have nothing that God has not given to you.
 

Daniel Veler

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I would caution you to move forward carefully, Daniel. You have nothing that God has not given to you.
All truth comes from God. Those that know the truth are guide by his Holy Spirit. If your spirit does not bear with my spirit then you follow your spirit and I’ll follow the the Lord’s pitot in me. Trust in the Lord is taught to us by God. As the scriptures declare we are all taught by God. And trust comes by hearing the word from God not by men.