Hi there,
So I have schizophrenia (which means my neurological wiring is limited) and I struggle because the Devil does not respect that I need space. I have fought the Devil many a time and have always believed that if I just inch further to recovery, I will be better off. I have never doubted myself (is what I am saying). It actually reached a point, where I was prepared to settle with the Devil for the rest of my life - that is, to commit to a walk in this life, that does not interfere with the Devil, insofar as he is not interfering with me! What I learned was, that the Devil does not work that way: you cannot say to him "leave me alone from now on", because we do not know what the future holds (and so can't make promises based on it). Now, you might be saying "that's a disappointment", but think about it, if we really knew where our mental health was taking us, would we really trust God to bring us out of it?
So it is that the Devil is moving to and fro in the world, making some people sicker, and challenging others to be healthier - as Solomon said 'there is good that happens to bad and bad that happens to good' (Ecclesiastes, from memory). What he does this for, is essentially a lesser mystery, but it is also instructive, because God does not well people to be self-assured that they will always be healthy! "Well people" - it even sounds funny. The point is, our mental health may come and go, but reacting out of pride to the Devil's attacks is not what God wants. This takes learning to watch and welcome the coming of the Lord. If the Lord is on our side, as again He does not promise He always will be, then even if the Devil attacks today, we will be able to stand against it. Now it is important to remember that the Lord suffered questioning His sanity, on the Cross: if He, being One with God, is tested this way, then we will always have to take up our cross and be tested also.
The joy of it is, that it is far harder to lose sanity that has been tested, than it is to provoke someone whose sanity is in question. The Devil will not keep coming if you stand firm and say "By God, I have already given you my answer". You may learn that the Devil likes to attack from a particular angle, you may learn that the Devil is defending a specific weight, the point remains 'today is the Day of you Salvation' (letters, from memory). You could not respond at all, and that is what many people with mental health issues do, to begin with - but at some point you need to defend yourself from what is not good. So how is it that the Devil keeps his "sanity", again that is somewhat of a mystery. We know that He hates Jesus and we know that Jesus loves him back; but beyond this life, in this moment, all we can say is "today is the day of our salvation - if there is need of more, the Holy Spirit will answer it" (drawing on the promise in John, from memory).
Now I hope this does not dishearten any of you, you who have held out hope that their mental health will somehow spring back to what it once was and not be a problem anymore. Certainly, I am not going to hold you to what I imagine "sanity" is, when I myself know that being gaslighted for mental health struggles is probably the most unloved state you can be in. But I do want to say, day by day "here is what made me sane, may it do that at least in part for you also". I want to be accountable to you, that "sanity" is not just expected, it is shared (and it is shared with love, Lord willing). This will help both you and I, that we walk together with the Lord, while there is time. Who knows, we might leap frog the problem altogether, a little - as Solomon said "if a man has a friend, the friend may help him up" (Ecclesiastes, from memory). I certainly hope that you are able to share your sanity, with the world.
I hope this has been of some encouragement.
God bless.
So I have schizophrenia (which means my neurological wiring is limited) and I struggle because the Devil does not respect that I need space. I have fought the Devil many a time and have always believed that if I just inch further to recovery, I will be better off. I have never doubted myself (is what I am saying). It actually reached a point, where I was prepared to settle with the Devil for the rest of my life - that is, to commit to a walk in this life, that does not interfere with the Devil, insofar as he is not interfering with me! What I learned was, that the Devil does not work that way: you cannot say to him "leave me alone from now on", because we do not know what the future holds (and so can't make promises based on it). Now, you might be saying "that's a disappointment", but think about it, if we really knew where our mental health was taking us, would we really trust God to bring us out of it?
So it is that the Devil is moving to and fro in the world, making some people sicker, and challenging others to be healthier - as Solomon said 'there is good that happens to bad and bad that happens to good' (Ecclesiastes, from memory). What he does this for, is essentially a lesser mystery, but it is also instructive, because God does not well people to be self-assured that they will always be healthy! "Well people" - it even sounds funny. The point is, our mental health may come and go, but reacting out of pride to the Devil's attacks is not what God wants. This takes learning to watch and welcome the coming of the Lord. If the Lord is on our side, as again He does not promise He always will be, then even if the Devil attacks today, we will be able to stand against it. Now it is important to remember that the Lord suffered questioning His sanity, on the Cross: if He, being One with God, is tested this way, then we will always have to take up our cross and be tested also.
The joy of it is, that it is far harder to lose sanity that has been tested, than it is to provoke someone whose sanity is in question. The Devil will not keep coming if you stand firm and say "By God, I have already given you my answer". You may learn that the Devil likes to attack from a particular angle, you may learn that the Devil is defending a specific weight, the point remains 'today is the Day of you Salvation' (letters, from memory). You could not respond at all, and that is what many people with mental health issues do, to begin with - but at some point you need to defend yourself from what is not good. So how is it that the Devil keeps his "sanity", again that is somewhat of a mystery. We know that He hates Jesus and we know that Jesus loves him back; but beyond this life, in this moment, all we can say is "today is the day of our salvation - if there is need of more, the Holy Spirit will answer it" (drawing on the promise in John, from memory).
Now I hope this does not dishearten any of you, you who have held out hope that their mental health will somehow spring back to what it once was and not be a problem anymore. Certainly, I am not going to hold you to what I imagine "sanity" is, when I myself know that being gaslighted for mental health struggles is probably the most unloved state you can be in. But I do want to say, day by day "here is what made me sane, may it do that at least in part for you also". I want to be accountable to you, that "sanity" is not just expected, it is shared (and it is shared with love, Lord willing). This will help both you and I, that we walk together with the Lord, while there is time. Who knows, we might leap frog the problem altogether, a little - as Solomon said "if a man has a friend, the friend may help him up" (Ecclesiastes, from memory). I certainly hope that you are able to share your sanity, with the world.
I hope this has been of some encouragement.
God bless.
