I reached a point where I was ready to conquer my schizophrenia, and God restrained me (pity?)

[Gottservant]

Hi there,

So yes I was born with schizophrenia, which manifested in my late teens and became a struggle into my twenties, and then was in the background of my thinking into my forties. I finally reached a point at about 45 where I felt I could put schizophrenia behind me and God restrained me. I have since come to the conclusion that God is not going to deliver me? I know Paul the Apostle had a "thorn in the flesh" which God did not remove - but I am skeptical about just accepting my fate. I would like a Word from God, about "why" basically.

My experience is that a mental health condition doesn't ever really improve, without someone praying something - that's why I'm posting this.

I'm not sure what the Holy Spirit would say, but considering the possibility is a start!

 

[Gottservant]

The medication I am on, is causing me so much grief.

My Mum says "you want to be a barista, memorize the different types of coffee", but it's like I am looking at blank pages - I don't remember almost anything.

"It's just experience" Mum says, completely dismissing that I am on medication at all!

Sorry, if I just cry on your shoulder for a minute!