Estranged from children.

[Ritajanice]

Anyone here estranged from their grown up children?

I’ve been estranged from my 2 older boys for over 21 years, my eldest got in touch with me last year, we met in Sept I think it was, so very emotional ,we kissed and hugged each other, met my grandchildren for the first time, 13 and 11.

Sadly I’m still estranged from my middle Son, praying that God reunites us before I die, I’ve never met my sons 2 children nor his wife..,..

 

[Ritajanice]

It is sad to hear about your situation. Can we assume you have reached out before, but something is in the way of reconciliation?

Dear Bob, this is a lady’s forum, no men allowed, thank you for your kind words.

I tried to reconcile x 2 to my middle Son ,he asked that I leave him alone, which I have respected, of course we have past history..he blames me for everything, pretty hard to bear hearing that....I’ve gotten used to not seeing him, he’s in Gods hands ..God knows my heart...how much I dearly love my Son, after all I gave birth to him...

 

[Debp]

Anyone here estranged from their grown up children?

I’ve been estranged from my 2 older boys for over 21 years, my eldest got in touch with me last year, we met in Sept I think it was, so very emotional ,we kissed and hugged each other, met my grandchildren for the first time, 13 and 11.

Sadly I’m still estranged from my middle Son, praying that God reunites us before I die, I’ve never met my sons 2 children nor his wife..,..

Sorry to hear. That's a blessing your eldest got in touch with you and you met your grandkids. Does he live very far from you?

Hopefully your middle son's heart will be changed towards you soon.

 

[Ritajanice]

Sorry to hear. That's a blessing your eldest got in touch with you and you met your grandkids. Does he live very far from you?

Hopefully your middle son's heart will be changed towards you soon.

Thank you,Sis,my Son lives in Cumbria..to far away ...when he gets the time, he messages me, my Son isn’t married , he had his children to a different partner, not the lady he lives with now, he sees his children once a fortnight, they are coming to stay with him on Boxing Day.,,he said that he will get my grandchildren to face time me on messenger, thanking me for the money that I transferred into his account....for Christmas.

They used to face time me regularly, not so much these days..as they are getting older...I love them unconditionally ..my granddaughter said when she’s older she will come and stay with me for a holiday..looking forward to that..God willing.

 

[Debp]

Thank you,Sis,my Son lives in Cumbria..to far away ...when he gets the time, he messages me, my Son isn’t married , he had his children to a different partner, not the lady he lives with now, he sees his children once a fortnight, they are coming to stay with him on Boxing Day.,,he said that he will get my grandchildren to face time me on messenger, thanking me for the money that I transferred into his account....for Christmas.

They used to face time me regularly, not so much these days..as they are getting older...I love them unconditionally ..my granddaughter said when she’s older she will come and stay with me for a holiday..looking forward to that..God willing.

Nice to hear that! What part of England is Cumbria in? And you are in which part?

Signing out for now...got to charge my tablet and eat. Yesterday my neighbor picked up Chinese food for me.... still eating that. I have nice neighbors.

 

[Ritajanice]

I think Carlisle is the capital of Cumbria, I live in Hampshire..my grandchildren have accents a bit like a Scottish accent.,I can’t remember how long he said it took to drive to Hampshire ,his Brother who he stays with when they visit, doesn’t live very far from me, he lives in Basingstoke, half an hour drive away...catch you later,Sis.

 

[Ritajanice]

She asked that we do not talk about how we became estranged

My Son says the same..I try to explain to him how I was brought up, in abuse..he just says,, let’s not go there, you know I find it difficult talking about my childhood,he can’t even call me Mum.that really hurts me.

 

[Ritajanice]

My two oldest boys were brought up without God..I was a non believer.

My youngest Son, was brought up in Gods Love, I could love him as God loved me, I didn’t know what Love was bringing up my older boys, they are a lot older than my youngest Son....plus to a different Father.

I have a wonderful relationship with my youngest Son, the enemy robbed me of being able to show Gods love to my other 2 boys.,,as I never knew what love was only emotional abuse.

Only by God showing me his Love , can I show it to my oldest boy..unfortunately he is over 50 and I can’t see him appreciating me cradling him in my arms and telling him how much I love him...

So when we type on messenger, I’m always telling him how much I have always loved him...and will always love him.

 

[Debp]

Only by God showing me his Love , can I show it to my oldest boy..unfortunately he is over 50 and I can’t see him appreciating me cradling him in my arms and telling him how much I love him...

So when we type on messenger, I’m always telling him how much I have always loved him...and will always love him.

That's good that you are now showing him your love for him through God's love in your heart. Do you sometimes talk on the phone? I'm sure he would also hear your love for him then.

We can pray your other son will eventually experience your love for him, too. Perhaps since his brother stays with him when he visits you... perhaps his brother will somehow convey the change in you and this will lead to a reconciliation.

 

[DuckieLady]

My oldests aunt warned me from the beginning. Her grandma gave me something and I asked what I could give her and she said "Your firstborn child." Her aunt said "You think she's joking? You better watch out."

I moved on and married into the military to start a new life and get away from the father's abuse. They did exactly the what they said they would do.

Due to a lack of family support on my side and harassment from the family, I realized I wouldn't be able to live with them. They treated me like a drug addict, which I wasn't, and monitored everything so much trying made me feel like I was being suffocated.

I thought about this today and the harassment I went through and today I am rejoicing because now she's an adult. Now, it's still limited to the holiday greetings, but that's still better.

I have forgiven the family but I am so glad that the control from this person is gone from my life and I never have to deal with it again. I am free, in this aspect.

Thank you, God, for freedom from chains of difficult people.